On Reece's Rainbow, the website for an adoption ministry that profiles special-needs children, it's easy to fall in love with a picture and a story. Lots of kids' pages have some medical information and firsthand progress reports from missionaries or adoptive parents who came for other children, but saw other kids in the same orphanage and took notice so that they could report back about how those kids are doing.
These anecdotes usually aren't that long or detailed. But humans are drawn to narratives, and there's something about knowing a little - anything - that makes it easier to foster connections.
For most of these kids, their best chance is for a special person or family to find a sketchy passage and vague photo so compelling that they're motivated to do put the wheels in motion. In a way, it's all in the story. But not every child listed on Reece's Rainbow has the blessing of a compelling narrative to help pull at the heartstrings of prospective parents and donors. Here's the information from Constantine's RR listing: "1nrmd-15. Boy, born October 2009. Gray eyes. The nature of close, calm. Constantine is paralyzed on one side of his body; he is a beautiful child!" And that's the sum total of the official rundown on Constantine. Basically name, rank and serial number. Even here, in this place that represents his best chance for finding a family, his voice is only the faintest whisper.
(Constantine's latest photo, from summer 2012)
Constantine really has no story - at least, not one that anyone seems to know. So I'll tell you what I do know.
I have virtually nothing on his background. I know he's from one of the Slavic countries, and that he does not live in a major city (but near one). I have no idea why he was given up for adoption or by whom, or even what his diagnosis must be - RR's website says he is paralyzed on one side of his body, which doesn't tell us much. I know he turns three years old this month.
The following was taken from a website for orphanage volunteers in 15H, Constantine's region. The group seems to be called "The Children in Need", and they work to donate money and toys to children in this region. I'm posting the translation, which reflects some slang - but it's pretty easy to catch on to the general gist. The posts are as recent as this summer.
"At first glance, Constantine normal child his age, but unfortunately it is not.
Health problems are many and they are not small. Constantine all smiles and having fun - a kind of boy ulybaka - and so pretty coo to himself. Constantine chubby pink cheeks, sparkling eyes and amazing smile!
"He is very calm kid, who responds to the surrounding events in the same way as all the children - his peers: with joy, care and sincerity. Constantine in his 2.5 years [this entry dates from earlier this year - Constantine is about three years old now] still sits badly on their own and almost did not go.
"In April and November 2011 Constantine was treated in ophthalmology. At the hospital with him constantly at the nurse and the boy sat down and began to walk a bit - including its merit!
All the doctors who were engaged in Constantine noted his strong will and a desire to become independent!
"It was also recommended to continue the occupation and then the majority of diagnoses will preodaleno now until the next admission, Constantine along with a nanny lives in a rehabilitation center, spa, where medical facilities are very good. Nurse leads to Constantine procedure takes care of him and is constantly engaged.Constantine, as Ilya and Sasha [two other boys mentioned in this same post], was hospitalized in the ophthalmic department for treatment.
"He's just a cutie. Often smiling and so sweetly coo himself."
Other volunteers have posted additional updates on the thread since the publication of the original post.
"Now, to the next hospital, along with a nanny Constantine lives in a rehabilitation center, health centers, where a very good medical facilities. Babysitting leads Constantine for procedures, cares for them and is constantly engaged."
"Doctors say Constantine advances in: pens have become more mobile, a speech therapist, he performs simple requests such as "put the ball in the box", and even breaks the repetition of simple words for the nannys - how Constantine tries!"
(Look how big he has gotten since these photos were taken ...)
"Constantine does not work the left side of the body. He really wants to get up, but he can not, strength is not enough. And Constantine so happy when the nurse comes up to him, picks him up and puts in a playpen. Indeed, support for child care helps to move on Coast arena [using context clues, I think this might mean 'around the edge']. In the arena of Constantine holding his right hand over the side. A right foot trying to step into. And so on all the way millimeter. Constantine is trying very hard to the left side of the body and start listening with great patience attends all procedures for treatment."
"After a hospital stay with a babysitter great progress. Constantine of good DR, there are worried about children involved with them. Progress not only did not disappear, but will continue. Sooner or later the child will have to transfer to another institution in the age ... really would not want it to be a home for the disabled. And for this boy to the development, individual lessons are important."
And according to one of them, he's got quite a way with the ladies!
"Thank you all for your support of Constantine - we have to pay the amount of child care to the next hospital. Constantine - understands everything, but do not speak. but that does not stop him because he liked to get a thing or achieve and maintain their views. Constantine firm. If he wants - better to give it to him and did not even argue with Constantine - selective. He did not take it that will offer, he will take what he likes. Despite the fact that Constantine does not talk and is not very well walk, Constantine - a real future man. Confident, strong, terse. Constantine gladly chat and play games. My favorite toy - this colorful robot that squeaks, rattles, sparkles and shimmers lights. Constantine not work until one arm. But the other hand is very strong and with the help of bone can move any object. Constantine learned to eat with a spoon, and now he eats. And as the dimples in his cheeks do not leave indifferent any of the girl next to."
The truth is, I wish I could be the one to take that step. I wish Constantine could be my son. It's really difficult not to be able to do any more than I can to help him.
I can't adopt Constantine, for various reasons. I don't meet the income requirements by a long shot, and there are other reasons that have nothing to do with money, too. Hard reasons to talk about. But even if I could overcome all the obstacles, that would take time and Constantine needs action now. He has only one more year before transfer looms. That isn't very long at all. When I think of how he could flourish with the therapy he receives there, multiplied ... and how he'll regress if he is institutionalized and the treatments stop. It's pretty heartbreaking and more than a little discouraging.
Even more frustrating than that ... even without a story online, I can't understand why Constantine is overlooked. Other kids with paltry narratives have been chosen before. I think he's an adorable little boy, and apparently he has a condition that responds well to therapy. Every time a Reece's Rainbow advocate posts a status on Facebook that reads, "Look who's on 'My Family Found Me'!" I hope against hope that it will be Constantine ... but it never is. His grant fund languishes at $268 - please don't get me wrong; I do not mean to discount that number. It took a lot of hard work to get that far. But the dollar amount needs to be greater, always greater.
All I can hope is that this post - or some post, somewhere - catches someone's eye and tugs at their heart. Virtually every day I seem to see kids on Reece's Rainbow who find homes and who suffer from far more daunting medical problems than Constantine's, so I don't think that's it. I think it's the absence of his story. So please, read what little I know and share. We don't have many words to describe him, but I think the ones we do have paint a pretty clear picture - a tiny boy getting the therapy he desperately needs, but is in danger of losing. Can't you just see him: insisting on trying to walk, playing with his toy robot, catching the eye of all the girls in his general vicinity?
I continue to try to find out more about Constantine. The silence and sheer lack of information is slowly suffocating his chances. I just wish someone else was on board with the enthusiasm, care and love I have for this child. I know there are others in the RR community who love him. What I long for is another person willing to take the special step - a leap of faith, really - and turn that whisper into a shout, to find out what Constantine has to offer.
I have a feeling the answer will not be a disappointment.
(You can join Constantine's Facebook group here.)
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